Sisters In Sobriety

Are You Co-Dependent? A 10 Question Quiz

In this special mini-episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen invite you to slow down for a few minutes and take an honest look at how codependency may be showing up in your life. This isn’t a diagnosis or a formal assessment—just a chance to reflect with a simple, 10-question quiz that’s designed to spark insight and self-awareness.☁️ In this candid conversation, we ask:Do you often feel responsible for others’ emotions?Are you suppressing your needs to avoid conflict?Is it easier to give care than receive it?💬 After the quiz, Sonia and Kathleen open up about how codependency has impacted their own relationships—from family dynamics to marriage—and how awareness has helped them move toward healthier boundaries and interdependence.🎓 You’ll learn:What codependent patterns can look like in everyday lifeWhy "fixing" others often leads to self-neglectHow childhood dynamics can shape adult relationshipsTools for recognizing when you're stepping into over-functioning mode👀 If you’ve ever found yourself walking on eggshells, ignoring your own needs, or feeling responsible for someone else’s emotional state, this episode is for you.📝 Want to revisit the quiz later or share it with a friend? It’s available on our Substack—along with tons of supportive content, reflections, and resources to help you change your relationship with alcohol and deepen your self-awareness.If you’ve ever felt like you’re losing yourself in relationships—always giving, fixing, or putting others first, Kathleen has created The Path Back to You is a free guide with a self-reflection quiz, five simple practices, and journaling prompts to help you reconnect with your voice, your needs, and your boundaries.✨ Links Links💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Let’s Talk Codependency: And What to Do About It

Today on Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen are diving into a topic that often comes up after we quit drinking: codependency. With Kathleen’s clinical expertise as a couples therapist and Sonia’s real-life experiences, they’re unpacking what codependency really means—and how to spot it in yourself.What exactly is codependency—and how is it different from being loving, loyal, or just... a decent human? Is it mutual? Does it show up only in romantic relationships? Can you be codependent with your dog? In this episode, Sonia and Kathleen explore these questions and more, including the red flags, psychological roots, and surprising ways codependency might still be running the show in your sober life.Listeners will come away with a deeper understanding of the difference between support and self-sacrifice, healthy interdependence versus emotional enmeshment, and how sobriety can reveal codependent tendencies that were previously hidden behind a wine glass. The episode also explores hyper-independence as the flip side of codependency—and why swinging between extremes isn’t the goal either.As always, the episode gets personal. Sonia opens up about how she once believed caretaking was the hallmark of a good marriage, how she walked on eggshells to avoid the "Kraken" (her ex’s moods), and what changed after getting sober. Kathleen shares insights from her own marriage, her childhood patterns, and how even therapists have to work on their stuff. It’s honest, raw, and full of lightbulb moments.If you’ve ever felt like you’re losing yourself in relationships—always giving, fixing, or putting others first, Kathleen has created The Path Back to You is a free guide with a self-reflection quiz, five simple practices, and journaling prompts to help you reconnect with your voice, your needs, and your boundaries.✨ This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our Substack for extra tips, tricks, and resources.Time-stamped Highlights[00:01:00] Sonia introduces the episode and shares a recent therapy revelation. [00:02:30] Kathleen defines codependency in practical terms. [00:04:00] Why codependency isn’t just about romantic relationships. [00:06:10] The difference between caring and being codependent. [00:07:30] Sonia shares a story about her ex’s “Kraken” moods. [00:09:00] Emotional reliance and attachment patterns. [00:10:30] Codependent parenting and walking on eggshells. [00:11:30] Red flags for identifying codependency. [00:13:30] Examples of codependency outside of romance. [00:15:00] How codependency forms in childhood. [00:21:00] Why sobriety often reveals codependent patterns. [00:23:00] What happens to relationships after sobriety and boundary-setting. [00:24:00] Healthy interdependence vs. hyper-independence. [00:26:00] Are women more likely to struggle with codependency? [00:27:30] First steps for healing and reclaiming your identity. [00:28:30] Book recs: Codependent No More and Facing Codependence. [00:29:30] Reconnecting with your needs—starting with Friday night plans. [00:30:30] What changes when you stop playing the people-pleasing role. [00:32:00] Guilt, grief, and growing into a new version of yourself. [00:34:00] Do you need to explain your boundaries to others? [00:35:00] How to handle guilt when you stop overfunctioning. [00:36:00] Final thoughts and encouragement to keep doing the work.Links💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Truth About Sober Dating, Sex, and Love with Sam Barnes

In this mini-episode of Sisters in Sobriety, we’re diving into sober dating with psychotherapist Samantha Barnes.Sam has over two decades of experience working with children, youth, and families on their wellness journeys. and she’s currently embracing the single life with clarity, confidence, and no time for BS. We asked her 10 honest questions about dating, sex, and relationships—and she brought the wisdom.Sam talks about being blindsided by how big of a deal not drinking was to a date, why she now leads with her sobriety on the apps, and the kinds of questions that feel supportive (versus just plain judgmental). She shares the red flags she used to ignore, the green ones she seeks out, and why walking dates are where it's at. Plus: her new philosophy on love (spoiler: it’s not about giving 150%).💬 Get ready for practical advice, honest reflection, and a reminder that your boundaries are valid—even on a first date.👇LinksTo learn more about Sam's work, visit her website or follow her on social media at @sweetspotcounselling. 💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Motherhood Without Chardonnay with Sarah Benton

Parenting while staying sober isn’t for the faint of heart—but you don’t have to do it alone. On this week’s episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen are diving into the layered, often unspoken, realities of recovery and motherhood with the brilliant Sarah Allen Benton. Sarah is a licensed mental health counselor, addiction specialist, and the author of Understanding the High-Functioning Alcoholic and Parents in Recovery. She brings nearly two decades of personal sobriety and professional experience to this candid and compassionate conversation.From blackout drinking in her early 20s to running a mental health practice and parenting a teen in sobriety, Sarah shares her remarkable journey and hard-won wisdom. Sonia and Kathleen explore questions like: What does it really mean to be a “high-functioning alcoholic”? Why is parenting in recovery so uniquely challenging? How can we teach our kids about addiction and emotional health? Sarah breaks down the importance of talking openly about addiction with children, how to handle digital addiction in the age of iPads and TikTokSarah opens up about her early drinking days, her moment of reckoning at age 27, and the slow, gray, sometimes thankless beginning of recovery. She also shares what it’s been like to raise a daughter in a sober household, how her marriage has been shaped by recovery, and why self-care is not optional—it's essential.This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our Substack for extra tips, tricks, and resources.Episode Highlights:00:01 Welcome Sarah Allen Benton and intro00:58 Sarah’s first experience with alcohol and her early patterns02:45 Blacking out from the beginning—what Sarah misunderstood about “normal” drinking05:12 Being a high-functioning alcoholic in college06:35 The illusion of control and trying to outthink addiction09:12 The moment Sarah knew she had to stop11:00 Building her own outpatient sobriety plan12:30 What early sobriety felt like (hint: not pink clouds)14:40 Writing as a tool for processing recovery15:35 Becoming a parent in recovery and writing Parents in Recovery17:05 Talking to kids about addiction and recovery18:45 The stigma of being a parent in recovery20:10 Raising toddlers vs. teens—sobriety challenges by age22:00 Hypervigilance and screen time addiction24:55 The science of digital hygiene and dopamine overload26:50 Creative ways to talk to kids about brain health and family history29:15 “The Telling”—navigating when and how to tell your kids you’re in recovery32:00 Kids noticing changes in drunk adults—and the emotional fallout35:30 The challenge of giving your kids real-world exposure without trauma38:00 Why this generation is more risk-averse but more anxious40:10 Self-care vs. soul care—and why it’s not optional for parents in recovery42:50 Recovery as a long-term investment, not a short-term reward44:00 Wisdom from single parents in recovery46:30 The myth of doing it all: learning to say no without guilt49:00 How sobriety changes marriage and dating dynamics51:00 Love without martinis: codependency, relapse fears, and boundaries54:00 The importance of having a recovery-affirming partner56:00 The parallel recovery journey for spouses and family membersLinksLearn more about Sarah!Parents in Recovery: Navigating a Sober Family LifestyleParents in Recovery Facebook Group💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Truth About Sober Dating, Sex, and Love with Ali Shapiro

Welcome to Sisters in Sobriety and our mini-series The Truth About Sober Dating, Sex & Relationships—where we get personal with our favorite guests in 10 spicy questions.Today, we're joined by the brilliant and refreshingly honest Ali Shapiro, creator of Truce with Food, health rebel, and emotional detective. You may remember Ali from our previous episode, where we talked about creating meaning beyond food. This time, we’re diving into what it's like to date with food stuff, relationship green and red flags, and how emotional safety is the real aphrodisiac.💡 From bracing for rejection to learning what she actually wants in a partner, Ali keeps it real about the awkwardness of first dates, being the “healthy one” in a relationship, and why her go-to sober date still involves fresh air and muddy boots.Plus: how Jason Mraz made it to her wedding playlist, and what she learned when marriage 2.0 arrived (aka, post-kids chaos). You’ll laugh, nod, and possibly reevaluate your own date night dinner order.🔗 Links – Get in Touch with Ali Shapiro:Free breakfast experimentTruce with Food group program 📬 Stay Connected with Sisters in Sobriety:• Sisters In Sobriety Substack - find more tips, tricks, resources, and community• Sisters In Sobriety Email• Sisters In Sobriety Instagram• Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast• Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Craving Love, Not Wine: Reframing Addiction With Dr. Donna Marks

What if every addiction—whether it’s alcohol, sugar, or even your phone—is actually a substitute for love?In this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen sit down with the wise and wonderfully candid Dr. Donna Marks. She’s a psychotherapist, addictions counselor, educator, and author with 30+ years of experience helping people find freedom from addiction by turning inward—not outward—for healing. She’s written Exit the Maze and The Healing Moment, and has created an award-winning addiction training program in Florida. Today, she joins us to unpack what addiction really is… and how self-love is the way through.We cover a lot in this episode—everything from the impact of childhood trauma to the sugar-cocaine connection (seriously, it’s wild), to whether things like medical marijuana or Ozempic are helping people heal… or just creating new problems. You’ll hear about the sneaky ways addiction hides in everyday habits, why medication isn't always the magic answer, and how to truly support your brain and body on the road to recovery.Expect real talk, powerful insights, and a whole lot of “ohhh that makes so much sense” moments. We also get personal—Dr. Marks shares her own story of relapse, healing, and radical transformation. Plus, Kathleen opens up about her sugar detox journey and navigating ADHD medication in recovery.Don’t miss Dr. Marks talking about growing up in an addicted household, what led to her own relapse, and how she reclaimed her life through love, not punishment. Her transformation is seriously inspiring.This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support space helping women change their relationship with alcohol. Want more tools, prompts, and inspiration? Head over to our Substack for all the extra goodness.Highlights from the Episode:00:02 – How Dr. Marks turned a painful upbringing into her purpose00:06 – What caused her relapse after 23 years sober00:08 – The problem with how doctors still treat pain—especially for people in recovery00:10 – Why she built an addiction training program (spoiler: no one knew what to look for)00:13 – Big Pharma, overprescribing, and how therapy sometimes misses the mark00:17 – Kathleen’s personal update on tapering ADHD meds and cutting sugar00:20 – That time sugar in salad dressing brought back all the cravings00:23 – Why addiction is never really about the substance00:25 – How childhood gaps in care create emotional holes we try to fill00:28 – What true self-love looks like (and how to build it daily)00:33 – Dr. Marks' take on how addiction drives most physical and mental illness00:35 – Screen addiction, food noise, and feeling stuck in a loop00:37 – Are drugs like Ozempic a shortcut—or just another trap?00:39 – How trauma can actually become a doorway to growth00:42 – What forgiveness actually looks like in healing00:44 – The telltale sign you’ve swapped one addiction for another00:46 – “Progress, not perfection”—why this mindset is everything00:47 – Final takeaways on sacred self-care, flexibility, and finding peaceLinks to Connect with Dr. Donna Marks:🌐 Website: drdonnamarks.com📸 Instagram: @drdonnamarksMore from Sisters in Sobriety:💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Truth About Sober Dating, Sex, and Love with Alida Flannery

What really happens when you start dating sober? Sonia sits down with Alida Flannery, a Certified Addiction Recovery Coach, founder of Epiphany Recovery, and co-founder of the women’s sober collective SOULBRIETY. Alida opens up about navigating love and relationships without alcohol—and let’s just say, her first sober date included dogs, a hike, and thankfully, no cocktails.Alida shares what it was like re-entering the dating scene after sobriety, how she negotiated her way down from a proposed 100-date challenge.Together, Sonia and Alida talk about what it means to stay true to yourself in the dating world, and why sometimes a second drink at lunch is more telling than it seems. This episode has raw honesty that only two sober women can bring to the table.If you’ve ever wondered how to answer “Why don’t you drink?” on a date, what it means when someone orders six martinis, or how to spot love that feels like home instead of chaos, this one’s for you.Enjoyed the episode? Show us some love—like, comment, and subscribe to catch more from our Truth About Sober Dating, Sex & Relationships series. And if you’ve got your own wild sober date story or green flag moment, drop it in the comments. We want to hear all the juicy details.Links• Sisters In Sobriety Substack - find more tips, tricks, resources, and community• Sisters In Sobriety Email• Sisters In Sobriety Instagram• Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast• Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Why Moderation Didn’t Work (Twice) With Chris Janssen

In this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia sits down with Chris Janssen—board-certified coach, author of Grace Yourself: How to Show Up for the Sober Life You Want, and all-around powerhouse when it comes to helping high-achieving women let go of shame and perfectionism and finally get free.Chris doesn’t just coach people through sobriety and mindset shifts—she’s lived it. After 14 years of sobriety, she found herself drinking again. She had the perfect life on paper, a thriving coaching practice, and a head full of recovery tools… and still, alcohol crept back in. What happened next? A whole lot of hard truths, humbling lessons, and eventually—freedom. Again.In this chat, we’re getting into: • What to do when you think maybe you can drink again• Why it’s so easy to fall into the “I should be able to moderate” trap• How to tell the difference between fear and vigilance• What to do when you’re stuck in perfectionism and performance pressure• Why community is the non-negotiable (even if you're embarrassed to go back)• The truth about relapsing—and why you are never, ever starting over from zeroChris also shares some incredibly powerful coaching tools for breaking toxic patterns, reframing setbacks, and rewriting your own rules. Spoiler alert: they’re useful whether you’re on Day One or Day 3,000.This is one of those episodes that’ll stick with you—because it’s real, raw, and hopeful as hell.This is Sisters in Sobriety—the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Come hang out on our Substack for tips, community, and the kind of conversations you won’t hear anywhere else.Episode Highlights:00:00 – Meet Chris Janssen: mindset coach, bestselling author, and secretly-struggling wine mom turned sober sage01:30 – Chris’s first sober journey: high-functioning on the outside, suffering on the inside05:00 – The moment everything changed: one meeting, one sentence, and a huge weight lifted07:15 – Raising three kids in sobriety and why “no one ever saw me drunk” isn’t the whole story09:00 – 14 years later: the move, the pandemic, the identity crisis, and the return of wine11:10 – Trying to “think” your way through moderation (and why it never works)13:30 – The trap of perfectionism: how losing her sober streak messed with her mind15:00 – When sober groups don’t fit—and why it’s okay to admit they’re not for you17:30 – The mindful drinking myth and other lies we tell ourselves19:00 – Fear vs. vigilance: how to fast-forward the tape without spiraling21:00 – Playing it smart, not scared: tools for staying sober without white-knuckling23:00 – Relapse shame, pride in reverse, and why going back can be the bravest move26:00 – Labels, stigma, and what to say when people ask why you don’t drink30:00 – What “grace yourself” really means—and how to stop trying to control your worth33:00 – Releasing perfectionism: write down your made-up rules and start again35:45 – Boredom or serenity? Why stillness freaks us out37:00 – First steps for breaking a cycle when you feel totally stuck39:00 – Peak performance and recovery: choosing your hard and focusing forward41:15 – How Chris wishes she’d handled her relapse43:30 – Do you really have to go back to Day One? (Spoiler: maybe not)45:00 – What’s next for Chris: more coaching, more writing, more realnessLinks & Resources:🌐 Chris Janssen’s Website📘 Grace Yourself (Book)📸 Chris on Instagram📘 Chris on Facebook💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen 📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Truth About Sober Dating, Sex, and Love with Hilary Sheinbaum

She’s back! 🚨 In this bite-sized bonus episode, we welcome newlywed and sober lifestyle expert Hilary Sheinbaum—the brilliant mind behind GoingDry.co and author of The Dry Challenge and Going Dry: A Workbook—for our new series The Truth About Sober Dating, Sex, and Love.We hit her with 10 juicy questions about sober dating, first-time sober sex, red (and green!) flags, her Barry's Bootcamp date strategy, and what love looks like without the booze goggles. 💪💋If you've ever wondered what to say when someone asks, “Why don’t you drink?”, how to survive your first dry date, or what Taylor Swift song sums up your love life—this one’s for you.💡Fun fact: Hilary met her husband because she stopped drinking. Talk about a sober love story.Links• Sisters In Sobriety Substack - find more tips, tricks, resources, and community• Sisters In Sobriety Email• Sisters In Sobriety Instagram• Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast• Kathleen’s InstagramSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hypnotherapy for Habit Change with Silvia S.

Ever wish you had a reset button for your habits—and maybe your relationship with alcohol too? On this episode of Sisters in Sobriety, Sonia and Kathleen are chatting with Silvia Subirana, a clinical psychologist and the Head of Content at MyDry30, an app that’s part sober-curious experiment, part life makeover. Silvia is here to share how MyDry30 helps people drink less (or not at all) without guilt—and how it can help you feel better in your body, your mind, and your everyday life.We’re diving into all the good stuff: Why does alcohol feel like such a default in our social lives? What’s the science behind changing habits (especially the sticky ones)? And how can tools like hypnotherapy, journaling, and movement actually help us feel more grounded and in control? If you’ve ever wondered how to quit something without it feeling like a punishment—this one’s for you.Silvia breaks it all down. We talk about how habits are wired into our brains, how our bodies often know what’s up before our minds catch on, and why adding more to your life (not just taking alcohol away) is a key part of feeling fulfilled. Plus, she shares the surprising benefits of gratitude texts, tiny daily rituals, and letting go of perfection when you're trying something new.We also get personal—Silvia opens up about her own story: a gut-health wake-up call, why she stayed alcohol-free even when she technically could go back, and how she found her way to MyDry30. If you’ve ever felt stuck in the cycle of starting over, or wondered if moderation is even for you, this conversation will feel like a warm hug and a deep exhale.This is Sisters in Sobriety, the support community that helps women change their relationship with alcohol. Check out our Substack for extra tips, tricks, and resources.Time-stamped Highlights00:00 – Meet Silvia, psychologist and content lead at MyDry3001:30 – Silvia’s path from psychology to sobriety to building a wellness app03:10 – The health issue that made alcohol a no-go05:00 – Why MyDry30 never uses guilt or shame to promote change06:50 – The app’s daily combo: movement, journaling, hypnosis (yes, really!)08:30 – Demystifying hypnotherapy (no swinging watches here)10:45 – Why “being in a trance” is just super-deep relaxation12:20 – How our brains form habits (even ones we don’t want)14:00 – Why journaling hits different than venting to a friend15:30 – How MyDry30 handles “slip-ups” with kindness17:00 – Shifting from “I can’t drink” to “I don’t want to”18:30 – The power of connection: why gratitude texts matter20:00 – Why alcohol cravings feel different from food cravings21:30 – When your body says “enough already” louder than your mind23:00 – Silvia’s take on healing stress through body awareness25:00 – Breathwork and grounding: not just for yogis26:30 – The 5-4-3-2-1 method to snap out of spirals28:00 – If you keep starting over, you’re not broken—you’re human29:30 – What is gray area drinking… and is it working for you?31:00 – Moderation vs. sobriety: which path is actually harder?32:00 – Be curious! Experimenting is better than perfection33:30 – What’s next for MyDry30: 90-day programs, your way34:45 – Wrapping up: it’s okay to go slow, and you’re not aloneLinksCheck out MyDry30https://mydry30.comhttps://www.instagram.com/mydry30app💌 Sisters In Sobriety Substack – where the magic (and the mocktail recipes) happen📬 Sisters In Sobriety Email📸 Sisters In Sobriety Instagram🌐 Kathleen’s Website Kathleen does not endorse any products mentioned in this podcast📸 Kathleen’s InstagramRead lessSupport this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/sisters-in-sobriety/donations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.